Hello, Gorgeous!

I am so sorry for the lack of posts, depression is a bitch at the best of times and is always a constant uphill battle. Sometimes finding the motivation to do the simplest of tasks can take everything out of you.

While looking around at different sites I stumbled across operationbeautiful.com.

While looking through all the comments and stories, I had tears streaming down my face. What the other Women (Girls) were saying really hit home. I constantly belittle myself, doubt my abilities and compare myself to other Women.

I have severe self esteem issues which I can pin point back to my Childhood. My Mother always told me that to be thin is beautiful, if your fat you are ugly and no one will find you attractive. Growing up believing that took its toll. I was a skinny kid, then puberty hit and the weight piled on. I was teased for being "fat" though looking back at pictures now, I was anything but! I was teased for my "unbrushed" hair which is still a sore point. If I had a dollar for everynight I have cried myself to sleep because of it, well, let's just say I would be a very rich Woman!

I don't entirely blame my Childhood as a reason why I feel about myself the way I do. Nor do I use it as an excuse. I also believe the media has an incredibly strong influence on the beauty industry and the way we feel about ourselves. We all know that the pictures in Magazines are airbrushed to high heaven, yet why do we still feel the need to compare ourselves to it. I also believe the beauty industry has moved on from pushing the air brushing thing and is now picking at our insecurities through lotions and potions that, quite frankly, are a load of shit. Deep down we know it, but we still buy these things in the vain hope that this 'new' and 'innovative' eye cream will dramatically reduce our sun damage or perhaps 'crows feet' which shouldn't even be a concern.....ever! I also believe that they make us feel inferior if we are over the age of 25. We are no longer young/sexy/attractive/whatever. I admit, I am daunted at turning 29 in a few months..... TWENTY-NINE!! ugh, I even hate thinking of it....

I digress,

I found this particular post and thought it was so true and I intend to put it into action, I strongly urge you to do it too.

1. Think of your body as the vehicle to your dreams.  Honor it.  Respect it.  Fuel it.
2. Create a list of all the things your body lets you do.  Read it and add to it often.
3. Become aware of what your body can do each day.  Remember it is the instrument of your life, not just an ornament.
4. Create a list of people you admire:  people who have contributed to your life, your community, or the world.  Consider whether their appearance was important to their success and accomplishments.
5. Walk with your head held high, supported by pride and confidence in yourself as a person.
6. Don’t let your weight or shape keep you from activities that you enjoy.
7. Wear comfortable clothes that you like, that express your personal style, and that feel good to your body.
8. Count your blessings, not your blemishes.
9. Think about all the things you could accomplish with the time and energy you currently spend worrying about your body and appearance.  Try one!
10. Be your body’s friend and supporter, not its enemy.
11. Consider this:  your skin replaces itself once a month, your stomach lining every five days, your liver every six weeks, and your skeleton every three months.  Your body is extraordinary–begin to respect and appreciate it.
12. Every morning when you wake up, thank your body for resting and rejuvenating itself so you can enjoy the day.
13. Every evening when you go to bed, tell your body how much you appreciate what it has allowed you to do throughout the day.
14. Find a method of exercise that you enjoy and do it regularly.  Don’t exercise to lose weight or to fight your body.  Do it to make your body healthy and strong and because it makes you feel good.  Exercise for the Three F’s: Fun, Fitness, and Friendship.
15. Think back to a time in your life when you felt good about your body.  Tell yourself you can feel like that again, even in this body at this age.
16. Keep a list of 10 positive things about yourself–without mentioning your appearance.  Add to it!
17. Put a sign on each of your mirrors saying, “I’m beautiful inside and out.”
18. Choose to find the beauty in the world and in yourself.
19. Start saying to yourself, “Life is too short to waste my time hating my body this way.”
20. Eat when you are hungry.  Rest when you are tired.  Surround yourself with people that remind you of your inner strength and beauty.